Rocky grounds
by Katteri
Summary: Into the future; Stan is gay - only Stan thinks he knows this. Besides he certainly can't tell his friends... Or his best friend whom he is in love with and especially not his on-off pregnant girlfriend... Soon he'll have to tell someone the truth or he'll explode. (Re-uploaded) Rated M for obvious reasons.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Set in the future, obviously... Or this story would be usually weird... Mind you, it is South Park. But the boys are older._

"_My name is Stan – (Stanley Randell Marsh) I'm sixteen years old and I live in South Park, Colorado... And boy, fuck do I sound like I'm writing a dating profile? I probably do... I attend High school. I'm in grade ten – tenth grade, however you wanna phrase it. The counsellor told me, with everything going on in my life right now, I should start trying to write down my feelings – gay right? Yeah... Gay... ... Gay just like me. - _

_That's right, I'm gay. Nobody knows. Nobody can find out, not my friends and not my on-off girlfriend either... My on-off girlfriend who is eight months pregnant with my child. Yeah, I'm gay and I fathered a baby – by complete accident. You see; I'm in love with my best (straight) friend. His name is Kyle, he's perfect, I thought if I tried dating a girl the feelings would go away. - they haven't, they continue to torment me and I think they always will... But.. Yeah, that's me. This is my life; fucked up isn't it? My name is Stan Marsh and this is my fucked up life." _

Stan's fingered stopped clacking the keys on his computers keyboard and started at the words he'd just typed out. The icon blinking awaiting on him to type more. He inhaled longly and slowly exhaled the deep breath, he'd held in his lungs for several moments.

"Fuck this." Stan said to himself, scoffing lowly as it put his hand on the black and blue wireless Logitech mouse and hit the little red circle in the left hand corner of the application, he watched the silver-white warning box with aqua interface, telling him his document wasn't saved, asking him if he'd like to, save, save as or discard. He moved his hand and the black mouse hovered over the 'Save' button before he closed his eyes and shook his head, he moved the mouse over and hit 'Discard' quickly and the document disappeared.

Getting up he grabbed his back-pack sitting on the floor behind his desk. He pulled his blue and red stocking cap over his short-spiked black hair and pulled on his black and blue winter coat. He'd just tell his counsellor he was busy with homework...


	2. Chapter 2

The moment I arrived at the high school, I knew I was late due to the lack of busses dropping off students to hang around outside and catch a quick cigarette before first class begun. Luckily for me... Yeah 'luckily' for me.

My first classes consisted of sitting in the guidance office, waiting for the counsellor to decide to show up and talk about my feelings, everyday. Like what the fuck was this? I didn't have much of anything to report on a daily bases. Nothing I wanted to share with a counsellor anyway. I could handle things on my own.

I tossed my Element black and blue backpack over one shoulder and slammed my cars door closed. I didn't bother locking it, there was nothing of use inside it anyway. And it wasn't worth much to steal. - It also wouldn't be very hard to figure out who'd stolen it, if someone had that much time on their hands.

Same old routine everyday from Monday to Friday, roll into school late;

Drag my feet to my locker and shove my bag into it between some rotten apple cores and crushed up papers. Re-lock the half busted combination lock and walk the twenty-three steps up to the second floor and down the same dull-dirty hallway into the smelling like cat piss office.

I sat down, looking around at the so called inspirational posers, 'Shoot for the Moon – even if you miss you'll land among the Stars', - "Bull-crap." I commented aloud without being aware of it.

"What might be 'bull poopy' Stanley?" Stephanie the Counsellor asked, appearing, her black leather bag of papers and files on one arm, a tray from a local coffee shop in the other and her keys, turning the lock on the door knob to her tiny office.

"Nothing." I sighed, standing myself up, brushing the wrinkles out of my blue jeans, I slipped my hands into my off-grey zip-up hooded sweater and followed her inside, she had papers scattered every where upon her desk.

"It's good to see you this morning, you missed out meeting yesterday." She pulled her black peacoat off and hung it up on the back of her office chair. "Yeah, I over slept." I couldn't help but badly lie, rubbing the back of my warm neck. "Okay Stanley." She accepted my lie to avoid my storming out before we even started... I had done that before – once more than several times.

"Have a seat." She gestured to the only other chair in the what felt like a prison cell, "hot chocolate with foam on the top, right?" She recalled as she pulled the medium sized up from her tray and held it out to me, she tried. Her smile always warming, always trying to help.

"Yeah ... Thanks." I said, avoiding her gaze as I slouched down lower into the chair, holding the travellers paper cup and held the hot liquid inside heating up my palms.

"You're welcome; so." She started, sitting down herself, pouring her coffee into her personalized mug and sipping on it slowly. My blue eyes slowly drifted along following the steam rising off the surface of the coffee and disappearing into the air above.

"So." I repeated what she'd stated. "What's been going on this week?" She asked and I felt my eyes narrow slightly. "You know. I've been here." I felt overly annoyed already. "Anything, coming up?" She wondered. She was always watching me, it made me feel uncomfortable. Like she knew... But she couldn't possibly know.

"No." I lied.

"Are you sure about that?" She tilted her head and I looked up to meet her stare, "why, if you already know do I have to tell you?" I hissed, before rubbing my forehead, sighing. "Sorry." I looked at the floor.

"That's alright Stanley. Your mother just mentioned Zoey will be having an ultrasound appointment Friday. I was curious if you were planning to attend?" I could tell by the way she questioned me about it, she expected me to go.

"I don't know. Probably." I said to shut her up. I didn't really want to go.

"Probably? "She raised her eyebrow, "Stanley, this is your responsibility to you know. Not just Zoey's you help creating this baby and you have to take care of it." She preached like I didn't know and I felt my blood boil over, it happened all to easy these days.

"I know!" I snapped, standing up. "I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW!" My yelling got louder each time. "IT WAS AN ACCIDENT I'VE REGRETED EVER SINCE!" I lost it. I couldn't hold myself back. I threw the cup in my hand into the trash can and I stormed out of the office as quickly as I could... And in that moment, I stopped dead in the empty hallway and looked around.

"Fuck sakes." I told myself, running my fingers through my black short spiky hair. "I'm sorry." I turned to look back at the office, Stephanie had followed me to the door frame.

She seemed understanding. "That's alright. I understand this is stressful for you. Perhaps enough for today and we'll try again tomorrow. Why don't you head on to class?" She suggested.

"... Okay." I nodded, agreeing with her. "See you." I hurried off down the hallway to get out of her sight. "Fuck Stan, hold it together." I whispered to myself.


	3. Chapter 3

Okay, so. The day wore on as dully and lame as ever, I couldn't quite focus on anything, I tried. I failed the pop-quiz in Chemistry. My friends kept giving me weird and questioning looks, asking me if I was 'okay' – like really guys? Of course I'm okay. I am just peachy-keen. Happiest I could ever be... Ugh.

My last 'class' of the day was Gym, oh excuse me, I mean physical education... What the actual fuck is the difference? Do you not run around like a moron in both? Yes. Exactly. But anyway, I decide to skip out on it; if it wasn't football or baseball... I wasn't expected to do much but stand there and look involved.

I hadn't been involved in playing football or baseball since last year; so much had changed from last year to this year. Star baseball player to football player. Pretty good looking teenager (although, I don't see it.) hot girlfriend. Now look. Gay and a baby-daddy-to-be. Of course, I was always gay but it was harder to bottle up anymore, I really was loosing control of myself. Back to the point, I skipped my last class.

Stuffed my books into my backpack at my locker, pulled out my car keys and I left. I went home, dropped my stuff at the front door and walked into the kitchen, my mom was sitting at the kitchen table and I froze. I thought she'd get mad, she usually got mad when I skipped school. "Hi Stanley." She said and I forced a smile. "Hey mom."

I peered into the fridge, seeing nothing appealing despite my growling stomach. "How was school?" She asked and I winced, "fine. Fine." I repeated. "Good... Good." She trailed off. My mom was disappointed in me. She expected better from me – I expected better from me. She hadn't treated me the same since the day I told her the situation, she still loved me – she was my mom, she had to. But it didn't mean she liked me anymore...

"I think I'm going to go to my room now." I felt an awkwardness between us. "Okay dear." She didn't look up from the paperwork I just noticed on the table as I walked by, trying to keep it casual but I was rushing... Back up the stairs and down the hallway to my bedroom which still dawned the 'Keep Out' sign I had placed up many years ago.

I closed the door behind myself, pulling my hat off, I ran my fingers through my black hair, pulling at it slightly. "Ugh..." I groaned, laying down on my messily made bed, closing my eyes as my head hit the pillow and exhaling slowly...

_With the Spring air still crisp and the frost making the uncovered grass crunch, I heard my mothers footsteps getting louder and louder as she made her way into the house from the front door instead of the garage entrance._

Using my sleeve, I quickly rubbed under my already irritated puffed out, red eyes. I sat in the living room, I was alone. "Stanley? Are you home?" My mother called, listening to the clinks as her keys and her purse were set down on the counter. 

"_Yeah mom." I whispered, trying to keep my voice from cracking. "How was your d—Stanley?" My mothers tone changed entirely when she walked into the living room and seen me. "I'm fine mom." I lied quickly as she came to sit beside me, "What happened baby?" She inquired quickly, mothering me, putting her arms around my shoulders, pulling me close. "Nothing." I didn't want to tell her, I knew she'd be so mad at me. I just, knew. _

"_Tell mom, what's the matter." She patted her sons head. "Mom." I whispered, looking up at her, scared. "Sierra..." I started, but stopped, I could't, "what honey?" She cupped my face now. Looking ready to go super mom on someones arse. _

"_Sierra... Missed her period." I whispered, I felt her hands leave my face and her expression change to a blank one. "Again... She took a test... It said... It said she was pregnant." I stammered out. I looked around as my mom distanced herself from me. "Oh Stanley..." She whispered, covering her mouth._

"Mom, I'm scared." I started crying again, without wanting to, the tears salt stung under my eyes which I'd rubbed almost raw with my sleeves from my pervious fits of crying. "It'll be, okay Stanley... It'll be, okay..." She assured, pulling me into a hug. "I think, you should go to your room for a while." She said breaking the hug between us. "Mom." I started. "I'm sorry." I said standing up, I left her alone... 

_Several hours later, with the quiet house, I lay in my bed, listening to my mom and dad talking in their bedroom. "Randy! You don't understand he's fifteen years old! This can't be happening. I thought our boy was smart!" - "Sharon, it'll be alright, he'll do the right thing." - "Randy! HE'S A KID!" - "Relax, honey. I know..." - "What did I do? Did I not teach him something right?" My moms voice broke as she started crying... ... ... ... _

"Stan? Stan... Hello... Stan?" A voice pulled me from my zoned out state of reliving the worst memories in my life. I turned my head in the pillow and seen Kyle staring down at me...


End file.
